NEW YORK 鈥� Of the many stories that have stuck with Ben Affleck from his Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, one has especially resonated for the actor. Recovery is often described as a process of removing a damaging habit from your life. One man articulated it in a more positive way. He said he quit drinking so he could be a free man.
鈥淭hat鈥檚 one of the most moving things that鈥檚 stayed with me,鈥� says Affleck. 鈥淭he desire for that freedom, and so I can be accountable to my kids.鈥�
After a turbulent few years, Affleck, 47, is trying to reclaim his life and reorder his career. In Affleck鈥檚 new film, 鈥淭he Way Back,鈥� both missions converge. He plays a former high-school basketball star brought back to coach his alma mater's team in Gavin O鈥機onnor's movie, which opens March 6. The film has obvious similarities to Affleck鈥檚 life. It鈥檚 about a man struggling with alcoholism, divorce and midlife disappointment. It's about the hard road to recovery, a path that Affleck has been walking, with a few stumbles along the way, the last three years.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 know all the answers. I鈥檓 only an expert in my own failings,鈥� Affleck says. 鈥淏ut the more expert you become in your own failings, interestingly, the less likely you are to repeat them, I鈥檝e found. That is how my life has been getting better."
Affleck smiles. 鈥淵ou notice how you never succeed and all your wildest dreams come true and you go: 鈥業 got to change something!鈥� It鈥檚 when you hit a stumbling block that you say: 鈥極K, let鈥檚 be really honest.鈥欌��
And honesty is what Affleck is now practicing, to a degree rarely seen in Hollywood, let alone for someone whose personal ups and downs have been such regular fodder for tabloids. In an interview with The Associated Press early last week, Affleck was candid and clear-eyed about his battle for sobriety and the roots of his drinking. Occasionally his voice quavered but mostly Affleck spoke earnestly and straightforwardly. He seemed freshly unburdened. Making 鈥淭he Way Back,鈥� he said, helped him.
鈥淪ometimes just feeling those feelings again purges them a little bit and frees you a little bit,鈥� says Affleck. 鈥淭his movie was hard to make. Sometimes it was painful. And sometimes I was embarrassed. And sometimes I couldn鈥檛 believe my life had any similarity to this.鈥�
When Brad Ingelsby鈥檚 script came to Ben Affleck, it was titled 鈥淭he Has-Been.鈥� Affleck was being pitched to direct. Coming off the best picture-winning 鈥淎rgo,鈥� he last helmed the Prohibition-era crime thriller 鈥淟ive by Night,鈥� an ambitious gangster film that made a modest impression at the box office. Affleck immediately connected with the character: Jack Cunningham, a former star athlete whose alcoholism, isolation and grief is lifted by a reluctant return to basketball.
Affleck appealed to O鈥機onnor to direct. The two previously collaborated on the 2016 thriller 鈥淭he Accountant,鈥� and O鈥機onnor ("Warrior," 鈥淢iracle鈥�) has proven adept at channeling larger themes through sports dramas. But until they began working on 鈥淭he Way Back,鈥� O鈥機onnor didn鈥檛 know the extent of Affleck鈥檚 problem.
鈥淥nce we started to prep the movie, he went into rehab. He sort of fell off the wagon. So now we were prepping the movie while he was in rehab and we thought it was going to fall apart,鈥� said O鈥機onnor. 鈥淏ut he still wanted to do it. When he got out, he was incredibly raw and vulnerable and I think a little lost just in regard to having to confront the demons.鈥�
Affleck says his drinking worsened around the time his marriage to Jennifer Garner was falling apart. Garner and Affleck, who have three children together, separated in 2015 and divorced in 2018. In those years, Affleck has made several trips to rehab. Last October, he was captured drunk on camera, which he then granted was 鈥渁 slip.鈥�
鈥淭he times that I鈥檝e relapsed, personally, have been not been because I鈥檝e had some bad thing happen. It鈥檚 been when I thought I had it licked,鈥� Affleck says. 鈥淎nd the next thing, you鈥檙e on TMZ and it鈥檚 a disaster. That teaches me that it鈥檚 just not something I can do.鈥�
All of that pain, and then some, went into 鈥淭he Way Back.鈥� For a scene in which Jack makes amends to his wife, O鈥機onnor told Affleck he was just going let the camera roll.
鈥淚t was probably the second take, Ben just had a breakdown. I鈥檓 getting chills thinking about it. It was like the dam broke and everything came out,鈥� says O鈥機onnor. 鈥淚 just remember the crew, everyone was frozen, watching him bear his soul. It was obviously real."
O鈥機onnor credits Warner Bros. Chairman Toby Emmerich with green-lighting 鈥淭he Way Back,鈥� a rarely seen thing in today鈥檚 Hollywood: an intensely personal, adult-driven studio-made drama. It was made relatively inexpensively, with a budget of $25 million, and it marks a clear pivot for Affleck. He last year left behind Batman after several 鈥淛ustice League鈥� films. The standalone Batman film, once to star and be directed by Affleck, is instead being made by Matt Reeves with Robert Pattinson in the role.
鈥淲hen I had the opportunity to direct and star in the Batman stand-alone movie, I realized I wasn鈥檛 passionate about it,鈥� says Affleck. 鈥淢y tastes have changed. I鈥檓 interested in different kinds of movies.鈥� Upcoming films include the Patricia Highsmith adaptation 鈥淒eep Water鈥� and 鈥淭he Last Duel,鈥� a medieval revenge drama.
Battles with alcoholism are never over, but they can get gradually easier to win. For now, at least, Affleck feels like he's grown. He's humbler. More honest. And closer to feeling free.
鈥淚 would not wish it on myself principally because of my children and because it has caused them pain, which I would give anything to change,鈥� says Affleck. 鈥淏ut I can鈥檛 change the past. I can go from today. I can make sure today I鈥檓 good. That鈥檚 what I鈥檝e got. I鈥檓 a guy doing good today.鈥�
___
You can find a fuller version of this story here: http://apne.ws/JPTSZIk
Jake Coyle, The Associated Press
