When Hawaiian-based, equal-rights activist Bill Woods first began his two-decades long battle for the recognition of same-sex marriage, it wasnt just the legal right to wed he was fighting for, says his widower Lance Bateman.
What a lot of people dont realize is that when Bill started, he wasnt thinking about marriage for himself, Bateman told me during a phone conversation from Hawaii Tuesday night. That wasnt the goal. He knew that once same-sex marriage was legally recognized all other rights would follow.
Bateman said despite the fact media reports last week questioning the legality of same-sex marriages performed in Canada turned out to be sensational and partly incorrect, equal-rights activists, as well as gay and lesbian couples planning their nuptials, are still on alert.
Theyre suspicious, said Bateman.
He says that suspicion could prompt same-sex couples to reconsider Canada as a wedding destination, which in turn could mean a decline in tourism dollars.
The issue made media headlines last week after an unidentified lesbian couple who married in Canada in 2005 applied to be divorced in Canada. The women live separately in Florida and England, jurisdictions where same-sex marriage is not legal. They want to return to Canada for a divorce. But according to Canadian divorce laws, couples must live in Canada for at least one year prior to ending their marriage. It brought back questions about whether the thousands of same-sex marriages performed in Canada can be considered legal if the jurisdiction where a couple lives refuses to recognize it.
According to Bateman, despite the fact same-sex marriage wasnt legal in the State of Hawaii at the time of their 2003 nuptials, after their wedding in Canada, back home Bateman and Woods were recognized as a married couple in much of their day-to-day dealings.
Even our bank recognized us as a married couple, Bateman said.
I met Bateman and Woods prior to their wedding in 2003. The couple jumped at the chance to be married almost immediately after the Supreme Court of Canada deemed Canadian law on traditional marriage unconstitutional and I interviewed them for a news story. The Canadian same-sex marriage bill was eventually passed in 2005.
The pair then invited me to their wedding, which took place on a sunny roof-top deck at the Coast Plaza Hotel on Denman Street. It was a romantic affair with fresh flowers flown in from Hawaii. After exchanging their vows, to everyones delight an exuberant Bateman excitedly declared, I love you to his new husband. By the time a hula dancer began gracefully moving to the Hawaiian Wedding Song, there wasnt a dry eye in the place. I remember thinking if there was ever a couple in love who deserved to be legally married, it was these two. We kept in touch and during visits to Hawaii, my partner and I joined Bateman and Woods for dinner or drinks to catch up. Despite the fact he was happily married, Woods never stopped fighting for the rights of others to do the same on their home turf. Last year, the State of Hawaii legalized same-sex civil unions. Sadly, Woods died three-and-a-half years ago cutting short one of the happiest marriages Id witnessed in a long time.
Bateman told me the controversy last week opened new wounds for him.
Three and a half years after Bills death I still feel married. When I lost Bill, the only thing I had left was our marriage and when I heard this I thought I was going to lose that too, Bateman told me. It was like a knife to the heart when Bill died, but it was the Harper government that twisted it.
And while last weeks controversy turned out to be not much more than a false alarm, it was a public relations boondoggle and the immediate global response demonstrates the responsibility Canada has in maintaining its reputation as human rights leader.
Twitter: @sthomas10
