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Exotic Junk Food Review: Risky biscuits

In honour of the FIFA World Cup and the arrival of summer, we’ve dusted off our Exotic Junk Food Review series from years past to explore some of the more colourful international snacks, treats and indulgences found around Vancouver.
biscuits
Exotic Junk Food Review is taking care of biscuits from India and the United Arab Emerates.

In honour of the FIFA World Cup and the arrival of summer, we’ve dusted off our Exotic Junk Food Review series from years past to explore some of the more colourful international snacks, treats and indulgences found around Vancouver.  

Originally published May 7, 2010

parle

Parle-G Original Gluco Biscuits

39-cents at Punjab Food Centre (6635 Main St., ph. 604-322-5502)

Country of origin: India

What it is: If the creepy, possessed demon child packaging is to be believed, Parle-G's original biscuits are the "world's largest selling biscuits." In your face, Peek Freans. The wrapper also emphasizes that its contents are made from "milk and wheat." And by that, they mean 65 per cent wheat flour and .6 per cent "milk solids." Presumably "wheat and edible vegetable oil" didn't have as sexy a ring to it.

Verdict: Not too bad if like you like digestive cookies with more of a sugary kick, or conversely, sugar cookies that dissolve in your mouth.

pineapple

Parle’s Delicious Gluco Cream Pineapple Biscuits

99-cents at Punjab Market

Country of origin: India

What it is: Take two Parle-G's Original Gluco biscuits, shrink them down and make a sweet sandwich out of them with artificially flavoured pineapple frosting (?) in the middle.

Verdict: Strangely moist and dominated by fake pineapple flavouring does not a delicious biscuit make.

mango

Tiffany Mango Flavoured Cream Biscuits

59-cents at Punjab Market

Country of origin: United Arab Emirates

What it is: Biscuits, once again, this time with artificial mango frosting in the middle.

Verdict: With its intricately designed wafers, and a brand name like Tiffany, these are definitely the more "refined" and dainty biscuits of the bunch. They're also the crispiest, with a mango flavouring that's subtly sweet without making your cavities hurt or smelling like fruity perfume worn by Grade 7 girls. In a word: good.

If you have any exotic junk food suggestions, send them to [email protected].